My personal favorite lesson from depression happened on a day (one of many) when I was curled up on my bed unable to get up, unable to smile, unable to pray. I could barely think, "Jesus help me." and that was all I had. But one day, I realized more than felt, that He was with me. He promised,
"Deuteronomy 31:6b He will not leave you or forsake you.”
He brought that verse to my mind, and the fact of it settled into my heart. He was with me. Right there. Right then. I was as spiritual, as righteous as I would ever be without being able to pray, without having a quiet time, without reading scripture, without witnessing to someone, nothing. I could do nothing and yet I still had the righteousness of Christ.
Many stories from scripture have blessed my soul in the darkness.
Jeremiah, the weeping prophet, Nebachadnezzar (weren't expecting that one I bet), David, the friend of God, the woman who bled for 12 years, Thomas, who doubted, and John.
John the Baptist. . . John the Baptist was left in a dank dark cell, and he didn't come out - until glory. Here's what I wrote a while back about that dear man of God . . . my blog was about legalism and so, my thoughts about John the Baptist started with Jesus's challenge to Nicodemus, a man lost in a different darkness - darkness of legalism
Nicodemus had built his own temple of good works. Could he now abandon them and turn to Christ Alone for his salvation? Could you turn from your weekly tithe, your Bible study time, your submissive role as a wife, your helping the fatherless and the widows, your contributions to missions or your own mission trips or even your life as a missionary. Could you let all that "burn up" and not be "counted"? Is Christ's righteousness enough for you? Could you not do another "good work" for the rest of your life and be content to rest in Christ's goodness for you?
When I thought of it today - "Could I give up my works?" My immediate thought was not of the loss of the works, but of the loss of the things that build my relationship with God. Could I not go to church for the rest of my life? That would be painful to not fellowship with my brothers and sisters in Christ. It would be painful to not hear the Word preached or to sing and worship Him. It would be painful to not have a Bible to read. It would be painful to not speak of Him to others. Indeed it would become a fire in my bones. I could not hold it in. (Jeremiah 20:9 But if I say, "I will not mention him or speak any more in His name," His word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot.)
Wow, it would be as if we were locked in a cell to live out our life holding onto only the Righteousness of Jesus - without the evidence of it - here comes the wow part. That is what happened to John the Baptist.
John himself said, "He must increase; I must decrease." But not long after "2When John heard in prison what Christ was doing, he sent his disciples 3to ask him, "Are you the one who was to come, or should we expect someone else?" Matthew 11.
John, in prison, sends a message to Jesus, "Are you really the Christ?" Can you fathom?
The one who was sent to "prepare the way,"
the one who so boldly proclaimed "I have seen and I testify that this is the Son of God."
The one who was linked with God the Father and God the Holy Spirit as testifiers that Jesus, the Man, was also Jesus, the Son of God, the Lamb of God.
4Jesus replied, "Go back and report to John what you hear and see: 5The blind receive sight, the lame walk, those who have leprosy are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the good news is preached to the poor." Matthew 11
Oh, my, I have just gone back to the cross reference of where those words were in the Old Testament, and I am almost crushed with the beautiful words that surround the message that Jesus sent to John. Isaiah 35:5 Jesus was telling John with words from Isaiah that He was fulfilling those words while John was locked in a dark dungeon. Want to guess that maybe John also knew the words surrounding that verse? Listen to the comfort of the words around Isaiah 35:5
1 The desert and the parched land will be glad;
the wilderness will rejoice and blossom.
Like the crocus, 2 it will burst into bloom;
it will rejoice greatly and shout for joy.
The glory of Lebanon will be given to it,
the splendor of Carmel and Sharon;
they will see the glory of the LORD,
the splendor of our God.
3 Strengthen the feeble hands,
steady the knees that give way;
4 say to those with fearful hearts,
"Be strong, do not fear;
your God will come, he will come with vengeance;
with divine retribution he will come to save you."
5 Then will the eyes of the blind be opened and the ears of the deaf unstopped.
6 Then will the lame leap like a deer, and the mute tongue shout for joy.
Water will gush forth in the wilderness and streams in the desert.
7 The burning sand will become a pool,
the thirsty ground bubbling springs.
In the haunts where jackals once lay,
grass and reeds and papyrus will grow.
8 And a highway will be there;
it will be called the Way of Holiness.
The unclean will not journey on it;
it will be for those who walk in that Way;
wicked fools will not go about on it.
9 No lion will be there, nor will any ferocious beast get up on it;
they will not be found there.
But only the redeemed will walk there,
10 and the ransomed of the LORD will return.
They will enter Zion with singing;
everlasting joy will crown their heads.
Gladness and joy will overtake them,
and sorrow and sighing will flee away.
Would those words not comfort you - especially if you were John the Baptist! John knew about the desert about the wilderness, He knew all about what these verses were predicting.
But now John knew of a different desert. A darkness and a hopeless desert that made him call out to Jesus and ask, "Are You real?" "Please tell me it's still true."
It makes me wonder if this were a passage that the young Jewish children learned. Or if just John and his second cousin Jesus learned it together as teen boys, and if John was at the temple when the boy Jesus was teaching the Teachers. Somehow John knew that Jesus was greater than he before it was revealed to him that Jesus was the Son of God, for he argued with Jesus that he shouldn't be baptizing Jesus but rather the other way around. Jesus was telling John that it was all coming to pass, that John had been right - that He, Jesus, really was the Christ! It was all the comfort John needed. He could put his head back down in his dank and dark prison and let his heart rejoice that Jesus really was the Christ!
And not long after, his suffering was ended - not the way any of us would have expected, but mercifully God took him home for his work on this earth was done and it ended not with a last sermon or 100 more baptisms, no more works for John, but the reassurance that Jesus was the Christ!
This time again I am crushed with the compassion of Christ. As if He had hugged John and through these words is hugging me too, so hard I can barely breathe. No lion will be there. None. It will be safe. And the ransomed will SING. EVERLASTING JOY WILL CROWN THEIR HEADS. GLADNESS AND JOY WILL OVERTAKE THEM AND SORROW AND SIGHING WILL FLEE AWAY!!
Thank you, Jesus, for Isaiah 35!!
9 No lion will be there,
nor will any ferocious beast get up on it;
they will not be found there.
But only the redeemed will walk there,
10 and the ransomed of the LORD will return.
They will enter Zion with singing;
everlasting joy will crown their heads.
Gladness and joy will overtake them,
and sorrow and sighing will flee away.
