Gross, Gross and Grosser

One of my kids was sick last night.  The word "HURL" describes it well.  "Hurl" from standing up, not from bending over the white porcelain potty.  "Hurling" happened in the upstairs bathroom; thankfully he made it that far, and thankfully the second time it hit him, he made the mark.  Lots of towels and rags to clean up.  Daddy gagged and almost added to the mess.  Mommy just rolled her eyes at him and tried not to laugh as our son was feeling so pitiful.

An hour later we tucked him in at the foot of our bed (on the floor), so we could help him if it happened again.  Almost asleep we were all settled in when he got up and headed to the bathroom.  Daddy said, "are you okay?"  Son dutifully responded that he was fine and we relaxed for a few seconds until we heard the sound of "HURLING" again - - from a standing up position.  It has a very distinct sound. . . . It sounds like someone has dumped a bucket of water (but it is definately NOT water) from about four feet up onto the tile floor (and up the walls and the baseboards and the door. . . )  In shock, we ran in  - - not looking forward to a second clean-up - (notice, we weren't as concerned about the kid, but about the clean-up!)  Nice parents we are.

Then the unthinkable happened, and I stood behind him and watched as it happened.  He probably just didn't want to step in the mess he had already made (because that was what I was thinking - ooo, yuck) he would have had to step in it to make it to that beautiful white bowl of water that would have been so simple to flush and watch it all go away. . . but, alas, the second wave didn't make the mark this time.  Lots of Yuck.  He was white as a sheet.  I think I was too seeing what I had to clean up . . . again. 

But it could have been worse.  Different son, several years ago.  Sleeping on the top bunk.  Got sick in the middle of the night, and not wanting to soil his bed,  Hurled over the side of the bed - - onto his sleeping brother in the bed below - - onto the carpet - - onto the couch where we read stories - - and onto his other brother in his little bed on the other side of the room.  That time too, Daddy gagged as we were scooping up the debris and we had to hide our laughter from the sick soul.  I still chuckle thinking about that night and us with dust pans doing our best to scoop as much as we could out of the carpet before the deep cleaning began all while trying to turn off our olfactory senses.

Only other night or rather illness that slightly compares, was the "get sick in the middle of the night, sit up and HURL all over your bed" sickness that hit my kids and many others about 7 years ago.  Yup, no lie, that's what was happening all around town.  Hit two of my kids on different nights.  Usually for other types of accidents, I would just pull out towels and let them go back to sleep, but not those nights.  Those nights were "turn the top light on, strip the kid, strip the bed, clean the kid, clean the bed, tell the other kid in the room to go back to sleep, pray the washing machine is empty, pray they go back to sleep and don't get sick again!" nights. 

No more hurling today, but I am ready.  I've bought several cleaners, Lysol, gingerale, gatorade, and oh yeah, I was supposed to by canned pears.  From my years of pregnancy I learned that only one food tastes decent going both ways - canned pears.  Pizza is horrendous; don't eat pizza if you think you might be seeing that meal again soon.  And if you do, don't say I didn't warn you.  Canned pears, that's a much better choice.

Well, I'm hoping that at least two of my kids now know how to make it to that beautiful thing called a toilet in time so I am not scrubbing floors and walls and baseboards or chuckling at my hubby trying to keep his own dinner where it belongs.  Good thing he wasn't a nurse, but then again, he makes his living by putting his hands in people's mouths all day. . . Hmmm, nope, I think being a nurse is worse.  Too many memories popping up right now, but, I definately think being a nurse is worse.